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| Crane taking off |
"You and I are worse that all men, for other men live according to their nature, where you and I live contrary to our nature!" St.Seraphim of SarovI watch these animals in their natural environment, and think how fortunate they are to be able to live in their environment under the influence of only their instincts. Where as I more often then not struggle in reflection.
Beautiful, majestic, powerful, natural, graceful.. I idealize the life of the other because I feel I too possess all these gifts, but am unable to activate them freely. It's easy to look at success, and take it at face value, but beyond the tremendous effort that goes into it, there is also the many displeasure that accompany the incentives, envy, greed, arrogance.. Feeling like now your on a roll you have to live up to social proof, and expectations! Perhaps my struggles and suffering, is really a great gift?
I remember in my youth being with a friend, the first time that I emotionally broke down in front of another person. He was a close friend, though far ahead of me in maturity, A university student, having traveled much of the world, from a solid family. He said "I understand your pain, we here at university are eating the cake, but your really only getting crumbs." I think now, that perhaps in my dislocation, I was in fact the one feasting, while they would continue to meander through life without ever really being pierced to the heart, by it's truth?
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| Two beetles humping |
As long as I'm able to keep a sense of humor, then I'll keep a sense of perspective as well. I'm very fortunate to a) live in the neighborhood that I do, with the natural resources around me that are their, while b) at the same time fortunate to move in the 'circles' I do. Fortunate because I don't really see them, their peripheries, and there is something special about that. That instead of trying to define them. They are working to define me! To enrich me, and empower me with all the instincts I will need for what happens next!
